Living the Single Life....All my Life.

Soon I'll be 21. 

And over the past week I've been reminiscing about the life I have so far lead. 

It's not too shabby I think but one thing has gotten to me. 

I've never been in a relationship. 

Ever. 

It's not so much as 'I've never been in a relationship' that's gotten to me, it's more that no guy (on this earth!) has thought, or said in so many words - "Daydreamer, you're amazing, I think you're wonderful and I want to share that with you."  

Fuck it - "Wanna go on a date?" would do. 

Or even a spontaneous kiss to show me would also suffice. 

I know I'll only be 21, but for me that's old. Watching friends go in and out of relationships at school, developing from school yard crushes to serious relationships, casual flings to girlfriend/boyfriend - I'm feeling left out. Again. 

Today I posted a cover photo on my Facebook page about being single - hello Bridget Jones, which numerous people liked. Even one person commented 'typical'. 

That's when it hit me; I'm known (not only by my friends, but everyone else that knows me - even a little bit) as the single girl. 

People in my life are used to me being single and it is common knowledge I'm always available and no person has seemed interested. I'm always just...single. 

I believe that if I actually managed to be in a relationship there would be people who wouldn't know how to handle it. It's unnatural for me to be with another human being in that way. 

I don't help the situation; I'm constantly complaining, making jokes, letting the world know that I'm single - either as a good thing or bad. 

The closer I get to my birthday the more I'm starting to believe no prince is going to come into my life. 

Surely it would be easier to give up and except the inevitable than to keep caring. Because when I care, I just end up getting hurt. 

When if my prince charming (in whichever form he takes) comes along; you guys will be the first to know. 

<3 

Being a Virgin is Making me Miss out on Some Serious Fun.

So I'm a total Single Pringle - I say it all the time, mostly complaining about it.
Guys never (and I mean NEVER) seem interested in me. And when they do, I'm not interested in them like that and I never was (nor will be).

Then on Friday I went out with friends for a birthday Friday. Let the loose morals and drinking begin! 
We hit a few bars, then ended up at the hipster bar I mentioned in May. 
We waited at the bar, when a guy stood in front of me and wished me a happy birthday (we had a birthday crown, which the Birthday Girl refused to wear, so it ended up being traded around) and we started talking. 
One of my more confident friends took over and got a free drink from it - I didn't mind, the guy was a bit older than me so I wasn't interested. 
We left the bar with a new friend - yep, the guy, let's call him Cradle Snatcher, decided to tag along with us. 
He started hitting it off with Miss Confidence as we hit dance floors, took shots, and pushed and shoved our way through the crowds. 
We then decided to go to a club notorious for old pervs, slutty women, sticky floors, and a ghost town (you don't go unless you want to die!)

I was standing at the bar (behind my friends) when Cradle Snatcher handed me a drink and we sat down. As the others joined us and began to chat, he whispered to me that I was the one he was after. That's why he started talking to me and admitted he was disappointed when Miss Confidence took over. 

Together we left the bar and as a group we hit Maccas (that's MacDonald's for my overseas readers) when some of my friends decided to go home. 
A friend and I decided to stay, waving goodbye to our other friends and Cradle Snatcher who was standing in line with them. 
My friend had a go at me - 
"Give him your number, he was into you", "You were both so cute sitting together," "He's hot, go for it."
But he was in line and we decided to walk off. 
My friend (The Pixie) was in desperate need for water, so we went back to the Hipster bar. 
On our way, a guy came up to us (from behind) and said 'wait up!"
It was Cradle Snatcher. Turns out he wasn't heading home and saying goodbye to Miss Confidence and Birthday girl before they left. 
Because we were going where we found Cradle Snatcher in the first place, he came with and went looking for his friends when we got there. 
Pixie got her water, and was chatting to some blokes when Cradle Snatcher came back. He held me close and took me back to his friends (after I grabbed The Pixie away from some old dude). 

The Pixie decided it was time to go and I agreed. I (thanks to The Pixie) gave my number to Cradle Snatcher and gave him a pash before I left. 

Now this is where my title comes into the story:- 

When I got home I received a text from Cradle Snatcher. Calling me cute, saying he wished I hadn't left and that he thought I had a smokin' bod. 
He wanted me to meet him again - right now. 
It was obvious what he wanted and to be honest I wanted it too. 
But there was one problem.
I'm a virgin. 
I'm a 20 year old virgin.
Usually it doesn't bother me - the right guy hasn't come along (probably never will, but anyway) and I haven't lost it yet. Just how it is. 

But I realised (as I flirted with Cradle Snatcher) that being a virgin is stopping me from meeting up with this guy, and having some fun. 

My virginity is holding me back. 

I'm young, free and have a great arse (thank you Mediterranean background). 
I want to go out and have fun - there's nothing wrong with that. 
But I know I don't want to lose it to anyone - especially if they're only looking for fun. 

I guess that means that there's only one option.....

Verydemotivational.com

So Many Assignments! Yet no Motivation

Hello Interwebs, 
How are you this chilly, yet sunny Autumn day? (unless you're overseas somewhere North, in that case, happy Spring?) 

Anyway, you'd be proud to know that I handed in my 2,500 word essay today :) 
Yay for Daydreamer! 
And I got some marks back from another unit - didn't fail anything; actually I did pretty well. 

So after a long day of editing, reading, writing, compiling bibliographies, I'm so tired. 
Though I can't rest - next week is a big week, which I have three things due :/ scared right now. None of them are finished by the way - in fact, there's one I haven't even started. 

Also, did I mention that I have a birthday next week? 
So on top of all that, I have a birthday to contend with. Though if it was anything like last years - which you can read here, I'll have nothing to worry about. By the way, I say there's fictional elements within the piece and I may have used my real name*. 

So it's with urgency I better start these assignments - but I just don't feel motivated. Even yesterday (a day before the essay was due) I was 'meh' to the whole thing. I guess that proves that it's late in the semester. Actually, I've only got a couple more weeks and I'm done. More time to blog - yay! 

ha, ha, I can hear you guys going 'nooooo' :P 

Sorry, for the boring post. I'm tired, and there ain't much going on in my life right now. But that doesn't stop me blogging. 
I promise next time will have something more interesting :) 

*something I never do by the way. Hm, I guess that proves I was really angry when I wrote it, and seriously need to change it. Actually I think I will.....

Well, This Will Be Awkward. A Dinner With a Competition

Hey there. 
If this is your first time on this blog, may I just say "hi" first of all, and secondly, one thing you need to know about me, is that I'm a socially awkward person. 
For those who have read some of my previous posts, this would be apparent. 

So it's with this attribute that I freak out about tomorrow night. 
I've been invited to a party - no, that's not the bad thing. 
It's technically my friends second birthday party. She had one about a month ago, but because not many people showed up (busy lives, they have) she decided to throw another one - at a club. Not a night club, like an old people's club. 
As a Facebook event, and being fickle, I put myself down as a maybe. 
Despite throwing this party for people who couldn't come last time, it turns out that there's only going to be a few of us there anyway. 
I was talking to the Birthday Girl (well, if you could still call her that) only a few moments ago when she told me that a few of the people couldn't make it, and if I go, there will only be four of us. 

Naw, a cute, small get together.

NOPE! 

Besides me and her, there are two others (I'm great at maths), two guys.
One was her ex-boyfriend - a Bogan apparently, who can be the bit of the jealous type. I've never met him. 
Guy Two is an old school pal, and coincidentally, also an ex of the Birthday Girl. He just recently asked her out again (twice) in which he received a no (twice). He also cried about it apparently (woose). 

Talk about awkward. 

So here's where the problems start. I know that tomorrow night will be a competition of testosterone as they battle it out (over the dinner table) getting an edge over the other ex. 
Birthday Girl will secretly enjoy it. 
I will sit there, with my lasagna, wishing that it was all over. 
AWKWARD! 
There's a big part of me that will not go. I don't want to - I really don't. Because my Facebook thing is a maybe, I believe I'm in my right to turn around and say "I'm not coming." 
However, I know I'll be a crap friend if I don't go. Also it might be fun watching a Bogan and a woose fight it out over a bowl of garlic bread. 

But then there's the dancing. 

The great thing about this old people's club is the Latino beats they play to get those seniors moving. 
And so we plan to dance also. 
But it takes two to tango (not three) and I have no idea how the dancing will go. Even if we make our own dance circle, I don't think that's going to make things any less awkward. 

I'm torn. I don't know what to do, and I'm freaking out about tomorrow night. It's going to be awkward and it's going to be a competition all night. 

What would you do? Would you stay, or go? 

Have you been in a situation like this before? 

Please, let me know. I need all the advice I can get right now. 

Birthday Blowout

This is a piece dedicated to anyone who has had a shit birthday (whether you choose to remember it or not).
Keep in mind - this is fictional.


Birthday Blowout.

Today I woke up, ready to relish in the spoils and lifestyle of that who celebrates a birthday.

Today it was my turn.

That one day of the year, where you (and only you) get to decide what to eat, what you will do, who you wil spend it with; the one day of the year, you can treat everybody like complete crap and they (in return) shower you with gifts.

I woke up expecting that morning.
I hear the buzzing of my phone and see a dear friend has sent me a birthday text - one of many I will recieve throughout the day.

Breakfast is made for me and I'm waiting to open my present.
This was the first disaster.
                                                                             *
My Mum had been talking for weeks about getting a stereo which she could plug her Ipod in. The idea of putting it on loud speaker while she did housework (I would just like to point out, my Mum does minimal housework and it is often done by my Dad and I) means she can dance while sweeping, dusting, whatever needed to be done.
I agreed it would be a good idea, for Mother's Day, or her birthday prehaps, and I made a mental note.
                                                                              *
Alas, when I opened my present this morning, there sat the sound system Mum had been bragging about for weeks.
This upset me; not because the sound system was crap or I didn't want it, it was because it was what Mum wanted - and now instead of getting it for her, she could pick something else she wanted down the track - while happily using my sound system - yes, my Mum is a cunning bitch.

After a dismal morning; this included getting into trouble for taking away an Ipod cord, which I sacrificed my Ipod being charged so my Mum could charge her Ipod while we were out.
And the fact all morning my Mum (yes the bitch) plugged her Ipod in the sound system and started dancing around the house. My brother came up to me and asked if it was my present or Mum's - what a smart kid - and it was pretty obvious who liked the sound system more; and no doubt, who would be using it.

So after that we went round to my Grandparents house - when my Grandfather opened the door, it was obvious he had forgotten my birthday, and there was a chilly silence in the air as my Dad tried to mouth the word "Birthday" to him.
Then my Grandmother arrived (ah dear Nanna) she didn't forget. And as she handed me an envelope (inside a card an money, was my prediction) she said
"Happy Birthday. 17 this year."
I am in fact 19 today.
So after correcting her (done with smiles and laughs) it wasn't long till my Aunty arrived.
This was OK - none of them forgot my birthday (and they new how old I was) and to top it off I recieved a good gift - finally something useful (take notes Mum).

When we got back home, I thought (no prayed) things would look up.
I had left my phone at home, so I thought there would be many texts from friends wishing me a happy birthday.
Of course there were none - none?
Only one friend had bothered (or more likely remembered) to wish me a happy birthday.
It's OK, I thought - check facebook, there's bound to be plenty of facebook messages there.

Because I am one for privacy on the internet - I don't post my birthday on there -it became clear that without the reminded of - "Today is Daydreamer's Birthday" - no one actually remembered - there were no messages on Facebook either.
But I'm glad I didn't post my birthday on there - because if I did then there would have been pages of fake well wishers and lying dick's pretending like they cared about my birthday - in which I would have believed them.

So I have five hours till my birthday ends - and unusually - I can't wait till it's over.
My only comfort is that it will be a whole year until I have to suffer the torment of having another birthday.

So lastly, "Happy Birthday to Me."

And yes, if you have read this whole post and wondering - this is not fictional - it is entirerly true.