When everyone moves forward and you're just standing there.

Today I found out some delightful news - my friend has won the internship in Sydney that she has been crossing her fingers all weekend to get. She'll be in Sydney for a month and she's over the moon. 

I have another friend who's going great guns at uni and will soon be travelling, exploring the world. 

One of my only single friends got a boyfriend a couple of weeks ago. 

And another close friend is off to join the RAAF in a couple of months. 

I'm so happy for them all - really. 

But as I sit here and reflect on my life: 

- I haven't travelled anywhere 

*inhale* 

- I have no boyfriend 

*exhale* 

- Uni is much the same. So is work 

*inhale* 

- I have no idea what I'll be doing after Uni 

*hyperventilating* 

Have you ever felt like that? When everyone's life is moving forward and you're...stuck. I thought I had a lot of good things going for me - that my life was getting back on track and soon things will be amazing and so will I. 
But it's not happening at the same time as everyone else. 

I'm freaking out and upset that I will end up being the pathetic friend who nothing happens to. 

#pityparty. 

Living the Single Life....All my Life.

Soon I'll be 21. 

And over the past week I've been reminiscing about the life I have so far lead. 

It's not too shabby I think but one thing has gotten to me. 

I've never been in a relationship. 

Ever. 

It's not so much as 'I've never been in a relationship' that's gotten to me, it's more that no guy (on this earth!) has thought, or said in so many words - "Daydreamer, you're amazing, I think you're wonderful and I want to share that with you."  

Fuck it - "Wanna go on a date?" would do. 

Or even a spontaneous kiss to show me would also suffice. 

I know I'll only be 21, but for me that's old. Watching friends go in and out of relationships at school, developing from school yard crushes to serious relationships, casual flings to girlfriend/boyfriend - I'm feeling left out. Again. 

Today I posted a cover photo on my Facebook page about being single - hello Bridget Jones, which numerous people liked. Even one person commented 'typical'. 

That's when it hit me; I'm known (not only by my friends, but everyone else that knows me - even a little bit) as the single girl. 

People in my life are used to me being single and it is common knowledge I'm always available and no person has seemed interested. I'm always just...single. 

I believe that if I actually managed to be in a relationship there would be people who wouldn't know how to handle it. It's unnatural for me to be with another human being in that way. 

I don't help the situation; I'm constantly complaining, making jokes, letting the world know that I'm single - either as a good thing or bad. 

The closer I get to my birthday the more I'm starting to believe no prince is going to come into my life. 

Surely it would be easier to give up and except the inevitable than to keep caring. Because when I care, I just end up getting hurt. 

When if my prince charming (in whichever form he takes) comes along; you guys will be the first to know. 

<3